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Last night I was talking to the Lord, but said nothing of my anxieties that, frankly, I was in denial about. It seems, in retrospect, that I thought I had enough faith to handle just about anything. So I kept my fears to myself and went ahead to pray for things like prosperity and health issues and the continued blessings that flow so abundantly from Him all the time. And then the download hit me. I was, deep inside, really thinking that He wasn't blessing me or answering me but my cheerfulness and martyrish ongoing was covering what would otherwise appear to be a lack of faith... In a prideful way... As I continued to take in just what God had to say to me in that moment it became very clear: I was praying out of order...

The message was clear: He said, "Everything's under control, and I have been answering your prayers, but you need to have faith. You need to grow. The answers are just flying over your head because you're not really ready for them. Grow in faith and then you will understand"...

I didn't hear an audible voice, but I didn't have to. It was like the message was unpacked in a way I could understand it, in a flash. And it was comforting. I understand it. And it's true. So I pray for Him to help me grow in faith, and instantly, the answer is, "I will"...